Happy Friday!!!!!!!!!!

So, today was one of those odd days. We had weekend plans, were excited for them, and then basically decided that it wasn't really what we wanted to do. So we changed them. Now just hanging out with Hubby and Cousin. Which is also nice. 


I've been dealing with some pretty severe loneliness, and lately, it's been causing me to take it out on the people  I love, mainly Hubby. Which has been hard for both of us, but thankfully we've been able to have some good talks because of it. I love the relationship I have with him. We're so intune with each other, we can sometimes read each other's minds. ....Ok, maybe not that much, but we are very intune. To the point of talking without doing anything besides looking and raising an eyebrow. 


.....Heh. I actually got the relationship that Sheldon and Davy had. I always wanted that. 


But! The weekend is looking up. We get our "spending/play" money tomorrow, and I'm going shopping. I'm dying my hair tonight. A light golden brown. Specifically for dark hair colors. It'll most likely have some red in it from the red, but I'm excited.  I'm also getting my nails done at a new place tomorrow morning, as well as going shopping tomorrow. I'm hoping to find some sales, but what I really "need" to get are a couple good pairs of leggings (for work and fun), some new girly items (mine have all worn out), and.....I'm going to be looking at some jeggings.. I know, I know. I swore I would never look at those, but I saw some really cute ones at Nordstrom's and I was done for. Literally done for. They're soft and durable! 


I'm also venturing, for the first time, officially into Forever 21 to do shopping. Iv'e wandered in and out of there with friends, but never to actually shop for myself. I figure two things might happen. I'll either adore the place and refuse to go anywhere else, or I'll hate it. I'm going for the former, given I have been in there before and I really loved most of the stuff I saw. 


I also want to buy some new shoes. All (and I do mean all) of my high heels have broken. As in, full on heel SNAPPED on me at work. That's kind of a problem when I need to wear heels at work. So, time to find new ones. Though I'm thinking Target and/or Payless for those. I'm not a fan on spending 100 bucks on a pair of shoes unless they're amazing (And no, I haven't found a pair that amazing yet!). Though I am eyeing some awesome boots from Fredericks that would almost be there....but going to wait for now. 


Oh, and eating has been going well. I'm not quite at eating every three hours, but I'm definitely getting there. I've also been counting calories and noticing more, which is helping me eat better. I'm more aware of what and how much I'm putting into my body. Also, as a reader pointed out, 3500 calories equals a pound. By cutting down to 1468 or less calories a day, I'm cutting out about 500-600 calories of my diet, which means over the course of a week, losing 3500 calories or a pound a week. Pretty cool, isn't it? 


So, what I ate today: 


Oatmeal 160
Yogurt: 180
Mocha Frap Light: 160! (I am so glad I found that out!) 
Hardboiled egg:78
Dinner: 800 


Total: 1378! 


I might get a snack later....we shall see. 


ALSO! My amazing maidofhonor/bestfriend is due TOMORROW. I am soooo excited for her and her hubby! They're expecting a little son who should arrive anyday now. At least, we hope. He seems to be taking his time and enjoying it. ;) 

Happy Monday, all!

Per that post from last week, the week went up and down a bit. Honestly, it was Spring Break for us, and it felt like the week lasted forever. I only had work, some stress, and then a very relaxing weekend. Hubby and I slept in, relaxed, watched loads of Dr. Who (who is and always will be The Doctor). I got creative and tried some new recipes. My favorite being the chicken pasta with the olive oil/garlic sauce. It was incredibly yummy and incredibly easy (and easily made vegetarian. Just don't add chicken!). I also added some Parmesan cheese on top and made it with some garlic bread, and voila! easy filling good dinner. 


Like the week, the weekend took forever to pass by, which was nice because it was a weekend, and they're supposed to last forever...so to speak. I finished two books over the weekend, which felt lovely (or was it three? Perhaps three). I know I finished Neverwhere by Neil Gaiman last week at some point. I also read Dirk Gently's Holistic Detective Agency by Douglas Adams (which I was told was based on the Dr Who episode he wrote, and I could easily see that. Very creepy amazing book). I also finished up Slaughterhouse Five by Kurt Vonnegut. It was about the Dresden fire bombing...and it was also one of the oddest books I've ever read. Intriguing. 


I had two answered prayers over the weekend, which surprised me, to say the least. I haven't been used to God answering prayers (that visibly, at least), so it was a wonderful blessing. I had made an honest mistake in something I was supposed to take care of. Unfortunately, it (as these things do) happened at exactly the wrong time, so it became a bit more involved. Crying and stressing and figuring things out later, two friends (you know who you are) provided what we needed. It was quite surprising and quite relieving. And quite odd to go, "Oh...I was stressing and praying without realizing it, and it was provided...." God's a sneaky fellow. Hehe. 


Oh. If you notice the tone of my writing sounds rather British, well that is the Doctor's fault. I've been watching him with Hubby for the last week or so, because the new series started up on Sunday (of last week). So now, two episodes into the new series, and Matt Smith is the Doctor. I don't quite know how it happened but it did, and he is the Doctor. After one episode. Well...after the three minutes he had at the end of The End of Time. The premiere episode just solidified it. I'm sad that David Tennant is gone as is Russell T. Davies, but I am incredibly excited to see Matt Smith as the Doctor and Stephan Moffett as the new head writer (I believe). He has written my favorite episodes so far (Girl in the Fireplace, Blink, Etc). He's the head writer now, and I am soo excited! The Angels are coming back! Ok. End of nerding out now. 


I have a big date coming up with Hubby. Well, me and a friend. He's taking me and my best friend out on the town or something of that sort. I don't actually know where we're going. He's keeping it quite close-chested. My friend and I have found our dresses (and they are gorgeous) and we are soo looking forward to it. Hubby's been teasing/taunting me about this date since he started planning it back in....oh gosh. February? January? Long enough for me to be twitching by now. And it is in two weeks! I cannot wait! There will definitely be a lengthy blog about it, I am sure of that, and hopefully some pictures. 


And of course, end of April is Hubby's birthday. We don't have much planned at the moment, as funds are a bit tight. I shall figure out something, however. Even if it means delaying it for a few days or some sort. Either way, I shall celebrate Hubby's birthday with him, and we shall have a grand time, no matter what. (And if any family is reading this, he would love some giftcards (Outback, Black Angus, Cheesecake Factory etc) /hint ;)


School starts up again this week, and not much time is left after that, come to think of it. 7 or 6 weeks? I'm sure my friends who are graduating know the exact number of days and hours. Sadly (or thankfully?), I am not at that point, otherwise I'd be stressing and freaking out to no end, I'd imagine. 


I have discovered we have two weddings within a month of each other. May is Hubby's dear sister and ex-roommate's wedding (odd one, that. They met because of our wedding, 9months later, engaged. Still chuckle at Fate). We are both in that one, so that week will be incredibly busy but fun. Then later on in June comes another couple of friend's weddings. Hubby knew them first, and we both were able to watch their relationship grow (I was able to help the Gal work through some issues at first) and now they're getting married in June, and I can't think of a better couple together. Very very excited for both of these weddings! 


Oh...and not to mention come June/July, our friends are having their babies. It was amusing, actually, that both of our friends got preggers within 4wks of each other! So very excited for them! Just two more reasons to go visit, and hold babies. And I realized I'll have to buy a collapsible playpen for when our friends visit with their babies! (Ok, I probably won't have to, but I want to.) 


I have been sad to realize that my journal, which Hubby got me for our first married Christmas together, has only about 7 pages left in it, before it's completely full. I looked/read through it over the weekend and realized just how much it has seen and recorded. Hubby made an inscription in the front which said (amongst other things) "Fill these pages with Love and Beauty". And that journal, while has seen some very hard and sad and hurtful things, has also served to record our first 20 months together as a married couple. It has seen us grow into our marriage, seen it thrive and move and deepen. I'm amazed that it's been almost two years (in August!). That journal has lasted me from December '08 until April '10. I am always so sad to end a journal. It always feels like an end of a chapter in my life, and I suppose it rather is. Though it means exciting time to start new journals! (Specifically the one my mother-in-love got me from S. Korea last summer for my birthday!) This journal ending, for me, feels like the end of my Newlywed-ness (though I haven't really felt like a Newlywed for several months now), and now a new journey is starting. A journey with my Hubby towards our Happily Ever After (to use the phrase often used by my friends). Well. That journey has always been going, I suppose. We're 20 months into it! Or...I really consider our time dating and being engaged as well, and then it would be almost 4 years. Or will it be five, now? No. Four. Anyway. That journal is finishing and has been the witness of the first 20 months or so of our marriage. I imagine when I'm an older married woman/mother, I'll look back at that journal and go, "Oh I was so very young back then." I tend to do that even looking at old entries. I can't imagine what I shall think when I am in my 40s or 50s, married, with kids, and go back to read it over. 


Hubby and I were talking about love (specifically our love for each other) a bit back, and I had summarized it as "More than yesterday, less than tomorrow". He didn't quite like that phrase because it's not that he has more love (the feeling) for me. It's deepened and grown and developed more. It's not the same as it was when we first got married. I assured him that's what I meant by that phrase. My love for him (and our love for each other) has deepened and grown and developed and matured greatly since having gotten married. We don't have a different feeling for each other. I think it's because our love has grown out of just 'feeling in love' to actually being love. 


Some things feel like they're going to be changing soon...I'm not sure how to explain it or what to even say, but it's like that itch in the back of your head. You don't quite know what it is, but you know something is coming...and you start watching for it. I feel like that. Something is going to change...I can just feel it. The itch. The idea forming. Something. 


The clever north wind was not satisfied. It spoke of towns yet to be visited, friends in need yet to be discovered, battles yet to be fought -Chocolat

Life is crazy at the moment

Well, hello there, dear old blog. Yes, I know I've been neglecting you. I'm very very sorry. Life has been insane lately. Don't look at me like that. I said I was sorry. Yes, yes, I'm going to update now.

*~*~*~*

So, life has been insane lately. School started, and literally I haven't a moment of down time. At least, not enough to sit at the computer and blog. Makes me sad, but such is life, I suppose?

Starting third week of classes. And so far, I'm enjoying my Monday Night one and disliking--a lot--the Tuesday night one because the prof isn't really doing his job and teaching waht we're supposed to be learning. It's supposed to be an Intro to Psych (Developmental Psych), and so far, we've only had 3 hours of talking about what he wants us to talk about, and not understanding a thing. He's teaching it like it's a discussion class when it's supposed to be a hard science class. I'm a bit annoyed and sad about that. I was really looking forward to this class. Here's hoping they (the department) figures out what to do about it.

My Monday night class, however, I'm loving. It's really hard but the prof is very good, and I'm learning a lot. I'm sooo glad I was able to take this class. The assignments are going to be intense--the whole class is!--and very good. Very glad of that.

What else is new....Oh!! We were able to work it out to get a brand new 2010 Scion xB, black. It's gorgeous!! We are so happy with it. It drives like a dream, and it's so nice to have a new car with a warranty and we're not worried will break down or anything like that. I named him Sirius. Yes, I'm a nerd. Hubby calls it a Golf Cart Out of Hell--cause it's small and drives like a golf cart. Hehe. We're doing really well, financially right now, which is awesome and a relief.

We have a buddy living with us right now ("Marine"). Marine called us up a few week's ago, with no where to go, and we told him to come crash on our couch, which he has been doing for the last few weeks. It's been interesting, to say the least. Mostly because we went from having no roommates to having 2 within a month of each other. It's working out well. He's searching for a job, does some cleaning around the apartment considering me, Hubby, and Kitty are out of the house from 7:45AM-10PM on normal days. Overall though, we're all settled in together. It's been good.

Though Hubby and I are realizing having roommates make for some interesting ways to get time to ourselves, especially when we want to just go out and talk without worrying about someone overhearing. Just those good married talks, and stuff. So we've been finding creative ways to do that--considering it's been so hot out still, our room is boiling during the daytime, Ick. Yesterday, we spent almost three hours out in the car, just talking about everything and anything and nothing. It was really nice. We've also been going on more dates--well, not more, just making a point of--to get time to ourselves. It's been good for us, and given our already insanely busy schedules, having roommates just reinforces the fact we need time together.

Having roommates, though, I've discovered, makes me get a bit more creative in getting away to relax and have some time to think and journal and write. When I'm at work 9 hours a day, then at class for three hours...it gets a bit wearying to then come home and have roommates around wanting to hang out or talk. I've taken to retreating to the bedroom with the netbook to write and read before falling asleep. On nights without classes, I usually will go out to coffee or onto campus to get some quiet time to myself. Which is nice for Hubby, too, cause then he gets time to himself as well.

Overall, life is incredibly good right now. I got to see one of my best friend's the other day--she surprised me by emailing me and going, "I'm in town on Saturday!! You free? I want to see you!!!". So we went to coffee for 3 hours, and talked, caught up, and just spent quality time together. It was such a blessing. Then Saturday evening, Kitty and I did some fun photoshoot stuff. We went with the whole Vintage "Pin-Up" theme, and the pictures turned out beautifully! I had a blast, and realized I enjoy getting photographed more than I thought I did. I probably just need to do pictures I like or something. Hehe. Sunday was spent realxing until we realized ants were invading. Then we battled them, relaxed some more. Friends came over later that night, and we all hung out, watched movies, ate dinner, and just enjoyed fellowship.

Overall, it was a wonderful weekend. And life is good.

Now, I need to get reading my homework for tonight. Until next time, and I promise it won't be as long as last time!!

Vacation soon

Today was an odd waking up day. The alarm went off--well, I should start from last night. Yesterday was an odd day, a bit, at leas--The weekend. Gosh, I'm off today. Saturday I slept in and relaxed because I hadn't had a Saturday to relax in for quite some time. It was glorious. Then Saturday evening, Hubby took me and a friend out to watch District9. A movie I am still trying to wrap my head around...but one that I probably won't watch again. Not because it is a bad movie. It is a very well-done good movie. Just makes you think, and is very very poignant. Once I have a better idea of my thoughts on it, I will post a review. As of right now, I do believe everyone should watch it--won't guarantee you will like it. However, it is one of those movies that you ought to watch.

Then yesterday did not feel like Sunday at all, even though we went to church and everything. I dyed my hair (yay!), and Hubby loves it. He can't stop looking at me, which is quite fun. Then Jason came over to visit last night and we made dinner, and hung out together for quite a while. Then He and Hubby went to see District 9 again, and I went to bed with a headache but happy.

So all that long intro to say, I woke up today hardly believing it was Monday--groaning that it was Monday--and then my mind did the "Oh wait, I'm only working 3 days this week! Hooray!!" and made Monday quite more tolerable.

Our one year anniversary is Sunday. I can hardly believe it's been a year, but also can easily. We are taking 3 days off work and going off on an adventure. One with a kingsized bed and hottub thrown in the mix. Hehe. I shall post more (and hopefully some pictures!) when we get back. However, for now, I can hardly wait.

That's all for now. Been doing a lot of thinking, and once my head gets into shape, I'll blog on it.

Summer life, so far...

I just realized I said "Summer life, so far..." and realized that the summer is half-way, if not over half-way, done. And so far, it's been mostly work and business. We had three weddings, friends visiting, but that's been about it. We haven't really had time/money to go on a vacation (yet, saving that up for our 1 year anniversary). I mean, I haven't even been to the beach yet this summer! Sad! Though necessary, I suppose.

Had some rough days this past week, but God is good. Aaron and I had a long talk while at work yesterday and into the night and cleared up a lot of stuff. God is good, as He keeps reminding me. The odd one I've realized is that the attitude I have currently towards God is that He is Good and King and trustworthy...in spite of life being hard and the world...well, as Rorschach puts it "God doesn't make the world this way. We do." I've adopted that idea, to be honest, to help deal with a lot. Not willing to do the whole "Satan is tempting me/persecuting me!!" thing...seems a bit cocky to assume that the lord of Hell who screws with nations, would stoop to tempt you, a puny human, himself. It is one where I do enjoy Piercing the Darkness, This Present Darkness. The demons have ranks and are all kinds...I think it's pretty accurate, and it frustrates me and annoys me to no end when people rebuke Satan himself or claim he's tempting them. I kind of scratch my head and go, "Um..healthy fear is a good thing. You should be afraid or at least wary of something that the archangels can't rebuke themselves..."

Ah. Rant. Sorry about that. It was on my mind for some reason.

Saw Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince the other night. It was really good. I enjoyed it alot. They did some interesting things with the plot, along with take out some stuff I wish they had left in. Overall though, it was very well-done, I enjoyed it, and I think they did a good job of portraying (most) of the spirit of the book. Really really! excited for the next two!!

We're headed to Savers tonight to see if we can find any thrift-store finds! And then to dinner at an amazing Mexican place that just started doing a " $8.99 all you can eat combos". Yummy!

Trying to figure out what to do this weekend...we'll see. Maybe I'll dye my hair or something...that could be fun. Or get my nails done again.

Back to work for me. Ta!

Summer in April?!?

It's 90 degrees outside. Yesterday was 102. Apparently it's summertime. Wait...it's APRIL. I don't understand it. I swear, the weather is bi-polar or something. One minute it's freezing, the next you should be spending the days at the beach till they close, because it's unbearable anywhere else. But of course...the heat wave only comes on weekdays. Meh.

Spring break was nice. Nothing crazy happened. Just worked, and slept, and hung out with friends, and slept some more. And worked. Last weekend we drove down to Escondido to spend time with some friends, go shooting at their parents' place (FUN!), and do some airsofting. The weather was gorgeous, and everything was so green and pretty. It was a very fun relaxing full weekend.

While we were down there, I had some time to just have some solitude and quiet time. They had all this property with roses and trees, and four dogs running around. I could hear birds singing and the wind blowing through the leaves, and it wasn't broken by sirens, car horns, yells, or anything like that. I had time to just go walking, thinking, enjoying the quiet of nature, while being close enough to people to not feel all alone. I could live up there. I wish I could. Being close enough to the city to not feel far away, but having a place almost to retreat to when you need to, to get away from the hustle and bustle of everything, and have time to hear your thoughts, essentially. I miss that. I used to have that, but don't anymore... There's just not many quiet away places around here. Everything's so bunched in and tight that there's no real places where you won't run into anyone...so I hope to find a place like that someday. I would adore living up in a house like that...or just in the country. Maybe someday...

I keep wondering what I want to do with my life...I want to help people, but my helping people is more in just blessing them and healing them and being there for them. I don't want to be a psychologist or an attorney or anything like that. I'd want to open a bookstore/bakery and just bless people like that. Maybe someday I will...I hope I will. I wish I had a bigger place so I could open it up for people to come over, grab a cookie or coffee, and just relax. I think whenever we get a bigger place (whenever that may be) I'll make it a point of doing that. And maybe even have kids running around in the backyard as I talk with the moms and all that. I really love baking and wish I could do it more, and also do it for family and friends. I just don't have the time right now. Which is sad cause it helps me calm and be relaxed. Kinda like playing piano. That's something I have thought of. Maybe teaching piano lessons (beginners) whenever I have a piano. Or working in a daycare or as a mother's helper or something....

As you can tell, lots of random things have been going on in my head lately. Just a lot of processing, reassessing, figuring out where/what I'm supposed to be doing. Lots and lots of prayers...

On the bright side, God's been really blessing me lately. He brought an amazing woman into my life who I can relate to and talk with, and actually understands. I don't feel so alone anymore...and it's amazing. It feels like God just said, "All I wanted you to do was to ask..." *bam* I'm still hurting and I'm still working through a lot, and a lot of things are fresh and hurt so badly...but...I'm trusting God. I know, even if I don't know how, that He will work things out and heal.

On that note, I'm going to finish up at work and then head off to class. Bleh. I wish I was at the beach right now...instead of getting off work and then running straight to class. But I'm having coffee tonight with a good friend! So that will be fun!

Heat wave is supposed to break tomorrow. Hooray!! Let's see if it actually does.

Hair's different...

So...I got my hair cut and styled, and dyed over the weekend. It looks amazing. I love it, as does my hubby.

I went to a Murder Mystery party last night where I was the bartender named "Molly". It was quite fun given that my hair is red so I really looked like a Molly. No alcoholic drinks but some good ones. It was loads of fun, and I don't think I've gotten so many compliments about how well I mixed drinks before. Guess all those times working as a waitress, multi-tasking paid off. And there's just something so natural about mixing drinks to me. I have a feeling of what tastes good with what, how much I should put in, etc. I love it. I'd seriously consider a bartending job at a nice Irish Pub if I didn't already have a good job.

This weekend has gone by so fast, and it's kinda a bummer. It's been an amazing fun weekend, just one of the more fast ones. This week will be busy because we have several things to do. Then Watchmen on Thursday night and Jr High Winter Camp this coming weekend. Should be a lot of fun but exhausting. First time I've been to a winter camp, and I'm excited. I love all of the Jr Highers and the Staff, so it shall be grand fun.

Off to muse more on my story and then watch a movie with my hubby before he has to go to a meeting on campus for a presentation. I'm going to go with him and relax. Maybe say hi to a few people, we'll see.

Hope your weekends been blessed and amazing!

Monday...Ugh.

So...it's Monday. Bleh. It makes this week worst too, cause I had last Monday off (yay for Pres' Day!). When I restarted this, I meant to post pretty regularly, but real life caught up with me over the last couple of weeks, and I didn't have anything to write on. Well, I had a lot of stuff I could write on, but nothing I wanted to.

Nothing too exciting in the past couple of weeks. Valentine's Day was lovely. We went out to dinner Friday night, then saw The International (it wasn't very good, unfortunately). Then on Saturday, we relaxed, and went out to see Coraline 3D (thanks to some good friends who gave us some $ as a Valentine's Day gift). Then Sunday we just relaxed, found out I had Monday off...so it truly felt like an extended Valentine's weekend, which was lovely.

Last week wasn't as good, unfortunately. Aaron and I both weren't feeling good all week, which made us more irritable, but we were able to talk out some stuff, which was good. The weekend was very nice. Went down to LA and Hollywood on Saturday, relaxed on Sunday, saw Twilight that night at the dollar theater (my soul still hurts!!). I don't know how anyone actually likes that story...it's horribly written, the characters are either under-developed or way over the top, and any instance of an interesting sub-plot is effectively killed. Plus you should never make a movie assuming the people who are going to watch it have read the book. Foolish and prideful. Ahh...what I do in order to relate to my Jr Highers.

Now it's Monday. Whee...? Wish the weekend could have been longer. This week should be decent, though. The end of the week is going to be fun. Thursday Aaron and I get to go see A Midsummer's Night Dream, getting put on by one of the high schools around here. The girl doing the costumes is in our youth group, so it'll be fun. Then Saturday I'm getting my hair done and have a Murder Mystery to go to that night! Next weekend is Winter Camp (hooray!). Busy next couple of weeks.

You know what's bad at the moment? Being married and wanting a baby. Hehe. I know we can't yet, we should at least wait until Aaron graduates, but damn...the longing's there. Especially whenever I see a cute little one. Saw a little baby a couple weeks ago, and I went, "Aww...I want one!" Silly biological clock ticking. All in good and God's time, I know. Doesn't mean I can't want one now...but perhaps I should be careful what I wish for? God has a sense of humor...

I've been trying to get back into writing...and I was rereading some of the stories I had started/written, and sometimes I can hardly believe that was me writing...it feels like my muse took off and ran. Or my imagination died because I've seen too much of the decaying world...and it feels like anything I try to write will be depressive and dark. Which might not be such a bad thing...So far, I have no idea of any kind of story to work on. Most of the stuff I've been writing is poetry to help me work out emotions, issues, and pains I've been dealing with. I can't really do that with stories...here's hoping my muse comes back soon. It should, she always returns.

Well, back to work for me, I suppose. And it's only 9:30. Wow...this day is going to be incredibly long.